Poetic Musings from the South Pacific - Vol. III

While fulfilling our dream of retracing Captain James Cook's adventures in the South Pacific, we have been joined by many friends along the way.  The whimsical poems that follow are the lofty thoughts of these colorful friends.

The poems below are from Thanksgiving week. Gary delivered the first poem. Then Anna delivered a sequel as did Eric. Gary's nickname is Matthew McManatee because the boat from the movie Fools Gold was parked next to us and all of the women went crazy over the fact Matthew McConaughey was on the boat. Plus we saw a Manatee that looked just like Gary! Enjoy the poems below!
Fair Winds,
Molly and Tom


The Tale of Molly and Tom Bedell
Let me tell you a tale of Molly and Tom
Or you may read it on majorwageratsea.com

A financial crisis on the world did loom
The forecast was worry, sorrow and gloom.
Our friends, the Bedells said. “Cest le vie!”
Bought a yacht and set sail on the sea

“Alas, but I snore.” Tom said to his wife
“I still love you” said Molly as she sharpened the knife
Yet deep down inside indeed she despaired
With the loud noise in the room that they shared

To fortunate friends they sent their invites
To share their yacht and take in the sights
The Watsons and Johnsons and Russells and Blitzens
Thank goodness there were no Palins and Nixons!

Like the night before Christmas it sounds like to me
I ’ll continue my story upon page 3…

Tahiti, Tonga, New Caledonia, and Bora Bora
Continues his habit: he did snora snora
Fishing, wakeboarding and diving he’d delight
But still he did snore all through the night

Until one evening Molly could take no more
“Please stop it, Thomas!” she did implore
The guests in agreement whose sleep had been breeched
Cried out loudly, “He must be impeached!”

Then suddenly Dear Molly whipped out a shank
And said, “This S.O.B. must walk the plank.”
“Yes” cried the crew from the next deck
“He kept us too!  Off with his neck!”

“No” cried Finley, “Just give him a snuggy”
“No way” said the crew – their eyes red and buggy
They put him in shackles and to the swim deck
Where ten KG ’s of lead they tied to his neck

“Any last words?” Molly asked amongst the jeers
“Only one thing” he said meekly, “Just CHEERS!”
Into the sea dear friend they did send
And that is how Thomas did meet his end

Everyone cheered, even sweet Kate
So joyful that Tom had met his fate
A prayer was said for the dearly departed
While on the poop deck, Riley Hoien farted

With that we ceased to hear his loud roar
And in relief Molly sighed, “Nevermore!”
Into the deep blue Dear Thomas he sank
We only have Sweet Molly to thank

He had met his maker, just like Captain Cook
But what I really want is you buying my new book
It’s not about history, science or geography
Just an interesting book – a plumber biography
It ’s not a story of plumber Joe or newscaster Hannaty
It’s a tale of a plumber named Matthew McManatee

- Gary McManatee 11-27-08


The Tale of Snuggies
This here is a tale about Gary Vos
And a young lad named Finley who thought he was the boss
In Matthew McManatee’s book
Poor Thomas’s fate was the same as Captain Cook
But, in my tale, Tom comes back from the dead
But continues to make the same noises in bed
While this was happening, young Finey came up with a scheme
To hang Matthew McManatee from a snuggy beam
See, Finley, Riley and Gary have quite a relation
To snuggies which are a new wedgie creation
As the two tales progress, what do we do?
We follow a plot made by the crew
We gave Tom a Breathe Right Strip for his nose
Which made Molly relaxed from her head to her toes
But what happened to McManatee you all will ask
We sent him to snorkel without his prescription mask
Poor Gary ran into the children with spears
And they ate him all up except for his ears
But do not worry the tale does not end there
Maybe Matthew McManatee is still in safe care
You must read my book to figure out the rest
Maybe McMantee’s leave was the best
But for now the boat is peaceful and a lesson taught
There are no snuggies allowed on Tom Bedell’s yacht.

- Anna Vos 11-27-08


 So I went for a dive
Almost 200 fathoms down
When I got to the bottom
I found Tom: He was mayor of Aqua Town

I said “Molly is worried, but mostly concerned
Tom was quick to rely, “Eric this far down I still get sunburned
I told Tom, “It’s probably time now to surface”
Tom quickly replied, “I now have a particular purpose”

After 20 decompression stops, Ton was still covered with salsa mussels
When we finally surfaced, it was from a manhole cover in downtown Brussels
We sorted things out and called Molly on the sat phone
She was in the Sahara, her throat as dry as a bone

She said, “What’s going on? I’m currently riding a camel
I said, “He’s having a good time, he’s having a go with Dorothy Hamil”
She said, “Get his butt here, I’m anxious to see him
Tom got on a plane and said, “nice to talk to you, I’ve got a new whim

“I’m now a mayor of a village called Aqua Town
There’s sort of a problem though, it’s 200 fathoms down”
Molly said, “That’s OK, I’ll go with you to the end of the earth”
Anywhere you want to go, as long as it’s not Perth

And now Tom and Molly, they’re both happy as clams
Both residents of Aqua Town, neither eating lamb
- Eric Hoien 11-27-08


French is Confusing:
"la fille" means "girl"
(That's all I need to know)
"lire" means "read"
(BORING! Lets move on to the show)
"la neige" means "snow"
(I love it every winter)
"asseoir" means "sit"
(like I need to sit here)
BUT...tell me this
As we toast with a little cheer,
If "Si" means "Yes"
And "Hola" means "hi"
Then what am I doing here?
- Josie Hoien 11-28-08


 It’s our final eve and I propose a toast
To Molly and Tom, the world’s greatest hosts
But I must also give some recants
About ruining Tom’s camouflage underpants
And retell the story because now you see
He was resurrected from the deep blue sea
I’ll get back to that after thanking the crew
For such a great job and their kindness too
We thank the great engineer Mark
Without him we’d all be in the dark
And how about our chef the fabulous Martha
She can cook a great meal while reading Siddhartha
We would be lost without our friend Kate
I think she was Finley’s first date
Also great too was our friend Jeremy
Although his snuggy crane really did scare me
Great their was New Zealander, our mate Cam
Who can do anything except make jam
And there was Jana who with her flirtatious wink
Could seduce any man quick as a blink
And while we’re at it I’d thank Sylvie’s mother
For not sending along her brother
What about that dance of Aussie friend Tator
I’ve a daughter, but would not let him date her
And last but not least there’s salty Walter
He can’t catch a fish, but on course does not falter
Molly and Tom we can never repay
The love and joy you’ve shown us each day
Till the day that we die will you be our best friends
But because of the snuggy I must make amends
I’ll buy you the best underwear from the Tree Sons
But remember to keep them out of your buns
Love you and Peace,
The Vos’s 11-28-08